At Queer Conception, we believe that every man, regardless of one’s sexual orientation or gender, should have the right to love a child of their own. However, while our research facility is still fighting for an answer for two men to biologically conceive a child together, at this time, conception cannot solely be achieved by a gay couple. Due to such, you and your partner will work closely with a fertility specialist, along with a gestational or surrogate carrier to have a biological child of your own. However, there are still a few pressing concerns to take into consideration before beginning your journey into parenthood.
The following basic information is here to help guide you in the beginning stages of starting your family:
In all reality, the final decision of which partner’s sperm will be used is a conclusion only you and your partner can make. In fact, both sperm can be used by using one partner’s sperm with one egg and the others sperm with another egg. However, due to the cost of donor eggs and the effect sperm health has in effective fertilization, we highly recommend that each partner goes through a semen analysis (only $30 each) to determine the sperm health of you and your partner.
Like choosing whose sperm will be used, there is no wrong answer when deciding an egg donor for you and your partner. Often times, donors are family members or friends but sometimes a couple may decide on an anonymous donor. Either decision is great, and if choosing an anonymous donor, we are here to help!
At Queer Conception, we have numerous donor eggs available via our own donor program. Between fresh eggs and frozen eggs, we ensure we will find the perfect match for you. However, by the chance that you do not find the right match for you, we can work in conjunction with outside agencies and nationally/regionally approved egg banks with the assistance of our donor team.
If the decision has been made that you will be choosing an anonymous donor through QC, your package will include 6 eggs to be fertilized with the sperm of your choice (usually one partners sperm, but sometimes both). In the case of knowing your donor, all eggs will be kept to yourselves and the number of eggs retrieved and cannot be known certainly until the egg retrieval itself. Usually, in younger and healthy donors, more than 6 eggs can be retrieved when using medications for ovarian simulation.
Determining who will carry your child, known as a surrogate or gestational carrier, can often be the most challenging part of having a child as a gay man. Your surrogate or gestational carrier can be someone you know well or orchestrated through an agency.
A gestational carrier is a woman who volunteers to carry a pregnancy for someone, however, the donated eggs are not her own. Therefore, there is not biological connection between the child and carrier. A traditional surrogate on the other hand is women who donates her own eggs and subsequently carries the child to term.
Whatever option you choose, we are here to help. For more information, please head to our gestational carrier page or contact our team.
While our website is a fantastic resource to learn about the basics of fertility, and the treatment plans offered at Queer Conception, remember that we are here to help along any step of the way. Therefore, please feel free to continue browsing our site, but if you come across any questions or are ready to get started with a free one-hour consultation, please don’t hesitate to reach out.
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